When I gained admission to the university, OAU, Ife, as a young boy many years ago, I was filled with joy and enthusiasm because I had my plan laid out to be a doctor, make my parents proud, and live the kind of life I wanted without having to worry about money.
My thinking was based on the fact that most doctors I saw around then were living the life I desired. Additionally, as a very sickly child growing up, I had so many doctor’s visits, witnessing my parents according so much respect to doctors, who were also well-to-do.
Even though the conditions of my home didn’t give me a good chance, I dreamed bigger than what I saw and ventured into the unknown in my mind.
The environment I was born into was toxic, so toxic I would never wish my enemy to be born into such circumstances. It wasn’t just a poor family, but a dysfunctional one as well.
Being born disadvantaged is tough, but not as tough as being disadvantaged into a polygamous family. The only thing worse than that is to be disadvantaged and born into a dysfunctional polygamous family. I had the fortune (or misfortune) of being born into all three. I hesitate to use “born poor” because no one is born poor; there are people who are not privileged to know the secret of life.
I experienced many sad and unfortunate moments growing up, and those moments didn’t stop playing in my soul for years. Not only did they keep playing in my head, but they also left an indelible mark on my impressionable mind, the consequences of which were felt for years.
Until I knew better.
The impact of what kids are exposed to in those impressionable years is far beyond what most people know.
Many people go through life and never overcome the trauma they experienced as children. This trauma becomes their identity and creates a repeated cycle of failure and habits.
I wanted to escape these bad experiences so badly and experience a life totally different from what I saw growing up. When you grow up in such an environment, you buy into limiting beliefs and a wrong mindset that stack the odds of succeeding against you. There has to be strategic reconditioning to break free. That is my life purpose.
I made up my mind that I was going to pay whatever price it takes and create a worthwhile life. My best option for creating a life I felt would be worthwhile and make my parents proud at that time was to be a doctor.
I studied very hard and denied myself some pleasures. One New Year’s Eve, while other guys my age were out partying, I was at my desk studying Biology, Physics, and Chemistry. Things seemed to be working fine until I met my first major failure.
I didn’t score enough marks to be admitted on merit to the university. I was advised, as the norm, to accept an admission to a less competitive course, Botany. I was to study that for a year and then transfer to medicine.
That dream never became a reality. My initial joy of gaining admission and the prospect of becoming a medical student became a nightmare after the first year. I had failed a part one course, PHY 101.
That singular failure ended my dream of becoming a doctor and also led me to my 10 years of meandering in the wilderness of life and the academic jungle of OAU.
I went through unimaginable trauma. Sometimes I’d be so consumed with anxiety that I would forget my location. Not one person understood the depth of my pain and anguish at that time. If you saw me during that period, I looked like pain and problems mixed together, and this continued for years. I went through three departments and was living in a confused maze of reality.
I ended up in the psychology department after six years.
When I eventually changed to psychology, I wanted to know how the mind works and how I can use that knowledge to change my life and help other people. That gave me a foundation for what I do today.
In my journey, I went through betrayal by people I felt should stand with me in my pain. People rejected my phone calls and spurned my love.
I experienced many dark days and even darker nights. There was one particularly dark night when I couldn’t pinpoint the exact reason for my despair. It might have been the realization that I was facing another extra year on campus, failing another course, or the struggle to comprehend my studies despite my best efforts. Overwhelmed with despair, I reached a breaking point where I seriously considered ending my life. I searched for ways to make it as painless as possible, but fortunately, I couldn’t find a means to carry it out.
Around that grim time, fate led me to meet a roommate who invited me to a lovely school fellowship on campus. During that fellowship, a young pastor preached about faith, which sparked a glimmer of hope in me and a vision to look forward to tomorrow.
Although my woes didn’t disappear immediately, the fellowship set me on a path of discovery and transformation. It gave me enough faith and courage to keep pushing on, even when I felt like giving up every day, and yet somehow found the strength to wait for another tomorrow.
The roller coaster of emotions continued until the end of the semester. During this time, I stayed on campus, trying to change my mindset by listening to motivational tapes and CDs. Although the changes were subtle, they were significant in the grand scheme of things, much like the effects of going to the gym. Eventually, I returned home to get some money.
Reflecting on those memories, I still feel a chill down my spine when I recall that dark time. I confess that I had bought rat poison at Ojota, a popular park in Lagos, with the intention of using it to end my life when I reached another dark place during the semester. I wanted to ensure that the means to escape wouldn’t elude me.
Looking back, I now understand that the moment of pain and frustration leading to such thoughts is a moment of selfishness and narrow-mindedness. I didn’t comprehend it then, but I realize now that life has a purpose, and we are all going through phases on our journey to help others. Every great thing has its moments when it doesn’t look great; it’s part of the journey.
One consequence of those challenging times was the severe damage to my self-esteem. I began using money to cover my imperfections and failings. However, I didn’t realize at the time that the purpose of money is not just to spend and make oneself look cool and perfect; rather, it’s meant to buy one’s freedom and eventually make an impact beyond oneself. Misunderstanding this purpose led to my suffering, and I ended up serving money instead of it serving me.
Later on, I came to the realization that we are here to serve and not just to feel good. Our feeling good comes from serving others, and we must be willing to go through whatever it takes to prepare ourselves for this service. When we shift our focus to serving others, it diverts the focus from our pain and opens up access to the possibilities of the human spirit.
Through the years, I continued to study about life, assets, mindset, identity, and service. I also surrounded myself with people who were doing better than me, always seeking to give and learn from their lives, not just to take.
And eventually, it paid off. One day, my soul opened up, and I discovered the secret of how our identity dictates the reality of our lives. I realized that we can never rise above the opinion we hold of ourselves. Armed with this knowledge, I started teaching and inspiring others who are going through the journey I had been through. My goal is to help them grow through the pain, experience freedom – physically, spiritually, mentally, and financially – by helping them take ownership of a new identity.
Being a student of life and entrepreneurship, I’ve been involved in various businesses, ranging from fashion to events to e-commerce to blockchain. I’ve experienced both successes and failures, and these experiences have shaped my understanding of life and success.
That’s why I founded Asset Power, an education platform aimed at sharing the knowledge I’ve acquired over the years with the world. Through Asset Power, I aim to connect people to cutting-edge life and business information, products, and resources that can help them build wealth from any level. Some of this information has been hidden for ages, but I’m committed to bringing it to light and sharing it with those who seek it.
I firmly believe that if you apply what I teach, you can’t help but succeed in life.
So, I invite you to become part of the Asset Power family and let’s build wealth together.
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